My husband told me to blog.

Actually, today being our 16th wedding anniversary, I was pondering on the many years we have spent together and it dawned on me...

I have spent more of my life with Ryan than without!

I did the math, just to be sure...

I estimate (not factoring in leap years) that at the time Ryan and I first started to really see each other (I'm not counting chance meetings prior to when our relationship really began.) I had been alive for about 6763 days.  6763 days "before Ryan".  But once we began to see each other, we saw each other every single day (except for the five while he was out of town) until we were married.  And I estimate (again, not factoring leap years) there have been 6825 of those.  6825 days of our "Happily Ever After" (so far). :)

Initially, I did the math based on when we first met, not when we started to date, so I announced on FB that about 84 days ago we crossed the halfway point.  But truthfully, even after we first met, I wouldn't say that was when my life with him began.  It was once we started dating.  And when I factored that, getting the numbers I gave above, that means that about 62 days ago we crossed that point.

I texted him to let him know of my realization, which he thought was very cool and told me I should blog it, hence this post and it's title.  ;)

Then he asked me to figure out when his "halfway point" will be.  Well, he is older than I am, so he lived more days before we met than I did, and he has a little over a year still to go.  ;)

I absolutely love that the majority of my life has now officially been with Ryan!  He is my best friend and is my very favorite person to be with!  I am so grateful that we have so many years left ahead of us... and then eternity to be together!  Anything less would not be enough. <3 p="p">

Mother's Day

I love my family!  I feel very blessed to have my wonderful husband and two delightful girls.  Mother's Day is always a joy for me.  I have few expectations.  I don't care about what I get - in fact, I usually prefer that they don't spend money on me at all.  I just love getting a day of them serving me. lol

From the moment I get up, I'm being told to stay in bed while they bring me breakfast.  And with breakfast, they always bring in homemade cards and gifts and I love it!  I especially love that as the girls get older, these cards and gifts are completely from them, their words, their ideas, their creativity.  Ryan did give me some fudge this year, with this cute little note:

Your love for me and the children is like fudge.  Sometimes soft, sometimes hard, but always sweet (and a little nutty).

LOL  I loved it!

I really enjoyed the talks in church about motherhood.  I especially appreciated the thoughts that motherhood is not just bearing children; that all can mother.  There are many who love and nurture those around them and they should be honored, too.  And I am reminded that I am not to mother only my children, but others as well.  I am grateful for all who help to mother my kids.  It is comforting to know that there are others who care and are interested in them and in helping them to be happy, healthy, safe, and successful.

After church, Ryan went to visit an older sister in our ward (that he Home Teaches) who has been in the hospital with some painful health problems.  He was concerned about her spending Mother's Day alone in a hospital room.  Initially we were all going to go with him, but it worked out better for him to take along his companion so they could administer to her while the girls and I phoned the moms/grandmas and prepared to spend the evening at my aunt's house.  I was touched that he was careful to take her some chocolate and a flower.  He is so thoughtful that way. :)  And, he was also careful to be back in time for dinner with family. :)

Our evening at my aunt's house was fun, as always!  We surprised her - she didn't know we would be coming over!  But her kids had asked us to and they prepared the house and food for company.  It was a good surprise, she loved it! :)  

I forgot my camera, but I stole some of the pics from Sami's camera:

And watch this funny video that Matthew took:

LOL... we always have fun with them!  I just wish I had thought to tell Sami to take a picture of her mom and I.  And one of me and my girls.  :S   Well, that's what I get for taking my little camera break.  ;)

I am grateful for my mother.  I am grateful for the example she has always been to me throughout my life.  And I'm grateful for the lessons that I continue to learn from her - whether it is me reflecting back on things she taught while I was younger, or things I learn from her now.  I hope she knows how much she is loved and valued by her children. :)

I am especially grateful to be a mother.  It is not an easy job and I sometimes get very tired of the mundane tasks and responsibilities, but I love my girls and I love that I get to be the one who raises them.  I love that they want ME.  They are so good to me.  It makes me want to be a better mom for them.  I love them so much!  

The post that was roughly 10 years in the making...

Last October, Ryan and I celebrated our 15th wedding anniversary.  For the last 9, we have lived here.  I don't remember the last time that Ryan and I "ran away" together.  I know it was before we moved here.  In Massachusetts, we were fortunate enough to have Ryan's parents who loved to have Acadia over for sleepovers, and we did take advantage of that at times.  Since moving here, we have had family vacations, but no romantic getaways.  Until a couple of weeks ago.

My wise aunt put a bug in my ear.  She and my uncle "run away" at least once a year for their anniversary.  Of course, their kids are all grown and can be left on their own for a couple of days, but she even offered to watch ours for us.  I found an incredible deal on a very romantic beach getaway package and booked ourselves a trip!  It turns out that it was during the school week, so instead of having my aunt watch my girls, my very good friend did instead.  It actually worked out perfectly!

So, a few days before Ryan's birthday, he and I drove to the coast to enjoy some alone time for 2 nights/3 days - JUST US.  We had a wonderful visit!  The room was perfect, complete with a fireplace, kitchenette, 2 person jacuzzi tub, king-size pillow top bed, flat screen TV, oh yeah, and an incredible view!  We were beach front, with a CUTE private patio that led right to the beach.  It was just amazing! 

We took walks on the beach everyday and even though it was cool, it was always beautiful.  Hello, it's the beach!

The waves were incredible!  And we had fun following them toward the sea, then running back as they chased us towards land!

On our first morning, we woke up to a rainbow over the ocean!  I had never seen that before!  Then the sun came out and we just couldn't resist another beautiful walk on the beach.

As we walked, we came across a pipefish that had been washed up on shore.  It was still alive, so Ryan picked it up and carefully put him back in the waves as they were rushing back toward us. 

The sunset that night was incredible!!!

Our last day at the beach was so bright and sunny!  The perfect way to end the perfect romantic getaway...

Great Advice

Ryan and I have been married for 15 years.  To some, that is a lot.  To others, it is nothing.  To us... it is not enough. :) 

Yeah, and we're sappy.  But sappy rhymes with happy and we're that, too.

There are lots of different kinds of people and lots of different kinds of relationships... and therefore, lots of different kinds of marriages.  So maybe what works for us, wouldn't work for others.  Even though Ryan and I have a great marriage, maybe what makes ours great wouldn't generate the same outcome for someone else.  I don't know.  It is hard for me to imagine it.  What we have is so perfect for us, I can't imagine why anyone would want something different... But then, that takes us back to how there are different kinds of people/relationships/etc.  I can't imagine it because I am me and I love what I have and I don't want anything different.  I do hope others feel the same way with their relationships.  I hope/wish everyone to be as happy.

Anyhow, when I read this post today, I totally agreed, and I could never say it as well, and besides, MMM has already said it, so I'm just linking to it.  Go read his post.  It is really great advice. 

A Month of Thanksgiving Day 10

As I mentioned at the start of the month, these are in no particular order.  If they were, this would have been among the first 3 days.  Today, I want to share how grateful I am for my kids.

Everyone thinks their own kids are the best.  And everyone would be right.  And so I know I'm right when I say that I really do have the best kids!  I am so thankful to be their mom and that they are here with us, blessing and enriching our lives daily.

We have been spoiled by Acadia.  Cadi is so good.  She just is purely good.  She isn't perfect, but she is sincere, honest, obedient, faithful, smart, and ... well, really, really easy.  I am sure that she is the reason why I still have my natural hair color.  It has been so easy with her.  She wants to make good choices.  Sometimes she makes mistakes, but she always tries to do what is best.  That being said, her room is almost always a mess and I usually have to remind her at least once a day to practice the piano and violin. ;) 

Aurora is not as easy, but she is still really, really good.  She started out a little wild but is becoming a bit more tame as she grows.  She loves to learn and do.  She is always busy.  But she also loves to help and she still asks to cuddle with me so I know she's not entirely ready to grow up yet.  I don't her to grow all the way up yet, so that is good.  I tend to have more patience with Rori but that is probably because I need to.  And it is also probably because I'm older and wiser now, too. 

I love both of my girls so much.  Acadia is my Mini Me, but better.  She is who I wish I had always been.  She teaches me a lot and she is a testimony to me of how strong these spirits are that our Heavenly Father is sending to the earth right now.  Aurora is my saving grace.  She saved me and I know it.  I didn't know how much I needed her until they placed her in my arms the moment she was born.  Her spirit is strong, too.  It is my deepest desire for her to direct her path to the right course.  We have been doing all we can to help her do that but we know that eventually it will be up to her.  I see glimmers of her future and I know she wants to be good and happy.  I just hope and pray that all that we do for and with the girls will be enough for them to want to choose the right. 

Ryan is the single most important person to me on this earth, but these two girls are right behind him.  I cannot imagine eternity without them, either.  And all I want is for us to be able to achieve that together.  In the meantime, I am so grateful that they are apart of our family.  They make life extra fun and meaningful and it truly is such a joy to raise them and watch them grow. :)

A Month of Thanksgiving Day 1

I've seen others do this, and sometimes it is called something different.  I don't know what the rules are but I don't really care, I'm making up my own rules because this is my blog, dagnabit!  ;)

I haven't blogged daily for a very long time, so we'll see how this goes, but my goal is to blog a gratitude post every day this month.  I have no agenda, no plan... there are lots of things that I'm thankful for that I will miss, things that may be extremely important to me, and just about everything I share is likely to be things I'm always (or at least often) grateful for, not just that day.  Duh. ;)  My only plan is to post what impresses me at the time I'm sitting down to write.  So, with that...

Today, I am grateful for my husband. (Warning: Major Mushiness to follow...)

When I think of Ryan, I am flooded with emotions that are difficult to express or contain.  For more than 15 years he has been my constant companion.  Whatever we have faced, we have faced together.  The good and the bad.  Ryan is my very best friend.  I never get tired of being with him, whether we are talking, working on a project, or just sitting quietly together.  We don't always see eye to eye, but we rarely fight.  It hasn't always been that way, but through years of practice, we are learning to respect and listen to one another... usually. ;)  I know that he loves me and wants to protect me.  I have heard him stand up for me, to defend me.  I feel so safe and protected when he is near me.  The touch of his hand and the look in his eyes can calm me more than any other physical thing.  Even when he has had a long, hard day, when he comes home, he wants to serve me.  He asks how he can help me.  He treats me not like a princess that needs to be pampered, but someone that he cherishes and finds joy in sacrificing for.  He says it's his pleasure.  And he means it.  He wants to spend time with me.  He likes to try things that I enjoy.  He finds that, often, he enjoys them, too.  He encourages me in my interests, supports me, cheers me on, praises me.  He lets me make decisions about our home.  He respects that it is where I spend most, if not all, of my day.  He wants me to be comfortable and happy.  He and I have a similar sense of humor.  We laugh... a lot!  He loves being a dad!  He always makes time for his daughters.  He loves to take them with him when he needs to run errands, and usually buys them a treat while they are out.  He reads them stories, tucks them into bed, sings to them, and prays with them.  He encourages them in school and in their hobbies.  He talks to them about God and life and all of the things that are important to him.  He apologizes when he realizes he has made a mistake.  He asks for forgiveness.  He is smart and has really good ideas.  He is interested in the world and what is happening, and how it affects us.  He is a hard worker.  He has sincere intents.  He always wants to help others.  He is one of the most unselfish people I know. 

Ryan is one of the best people I know.  And I know that I'm a better person because of him.  I love spending my life with him.  I cannot bear the thought of spending any time without him.  He often hears me say, "I go, we go, " or "You go, we go."  His love gives me strength and courage.  He makes me feel so special.  Sometimes I think he's like Shallow Hal (when Hal's not being shallow, lol).  It is like he sees something in me that no one else (myself included), can see.  But he sees it and is so confident in it and treats me like I'm that amazing person, that it makes me believe that he might actually be right, that I might actually be who he sees.  It certainly makes me want to be her!

I hope that one day, Ryan and I are considered an inseperable duo.  Where you just can't think of one without thinking of the other.  Like peanut butter and jelly, movies and popcorn, Tom Brady and the Patriots, Disney and Mickey Mouse, Darcy and Elizabeth Bennet.  If someone looks at me, just me, I want them to think that I am "one half the greatest love story ever told*," because I cannot be complete without him.

Someone said you shouldn't love someone because you need them; you should need them because you love them.  I need him because I love him.  And I am the luckiest person because I have him, not only for now, but for always.  And I am so grateful. :)

*Quote from the movie,  Lost in Austen

Reflecting

I'll get back to finishing up our Disney memories soon, but for now I thought I'd take a moment to post about something else.

Last week, Ryan and I celebrated our 15th wedding anniversary!  15 years is a long time but not nearly as long as I want to be stuck with this guy. ;)  We have tickets to go to a LOTR concert next week to celebrate.  We can't wait! :)

I sure love him.  He is my best friend and we have so much fun together.  I think we've got a pretty healthy relationship; it has taken a lot of work through the years, but we are in such a good place now.  We talk, we laugh, we disuss, we listen... I am so grateful to have Ryan and I am so glad we can be together for eternity.  When I see how fast time is flying by, I realize just how short life can be.  I am so glad our relationship doesn't have to end when our time here does.  Heaven will be no good to me if Ryan's not there with me. 

Life isn't perfect and neither are we, but I am just so perfectly happy with him. :)

This past weekend I went on a beach retreat with some of the ladies from church.  We spent a couple of days on the coast and had a great time!  I love taking opportunities like this to just relax and enjoy a break from the daily demands of life.

Being a wife, mom, and homemaker is my full-time job.  I love my job, but it can be tiring when you don't ever get a break.  I know I've got it easy.  My kids are good kids and my husband is a wonderful husband, the girls are both in school all day, and Ryan provides for all of our needs on his income which gives me the opportunity to stay home, so I really don't have much to complain about.  But no matter how much you love it, sometimes you do still need a break.  Moms don't get nights or weekends off, we don't even get holidays or vacations since we're still cooking/cleaning/dressing/watching... and even when I'm not working, I'm still surrounded by my workplace.  I love it, but getting away from it can be a welcome release from time to time.

So, I run away.  Usually about twice a year.  In the spring with girlfriends to Women's Conference at BYU and in the fall with the RS to the beach.  Fortunately, Ryan is beyond supportive and makes sure I can do both.  See, I told you he was a keeper. ;)

Coming home from my getaways is the best!  I always come home so anxious to see my family.  I really do love them and I really do love serving them.  I come back wanting to be a better wife and mom, to show them how much I appreciate them.

This time I came back to a sick little girl, so I kept her home with me today instead of letting her go to school.  She is sad that she's missing school and hopefully she'll be feeling better tomorrow so she can go back, but for now I'm enjoying having her here.  It has only been about a month since she was always here with me everyday.  I miss her!  So, we're going to snuggle on the couch to watch a movie and I hope she falls asleep for a little nap.  I might even take one with her. ;)

This is my life.  I'm so blessed.  It is good.  :)

Harry Potter Spoiler

But only if you've never read the books.

I took Cadi to see the last Harry Potter movie.  I am sad that it's over.  It is such a great series!!!

We knew it would be emotional and came prepared.  We both required Kleenex.  There are lots of moments that I found teary (and sometimes even choked up and near sobbing) about.  But the one that has stuck with me into today is Snape.

Severus Snape.

You start the series not sure what to think.  Some moments you absolutely HATE him!  Sometimes you think you might like him.  Sometimes he makes you laugh.  But no matter what your overall feeling about Snape is, you never truly begin to understand him until the very end.  Then all of a sudden, you see him differently (even if you already liked him).  All of a sudden you see a new side to him, the part that was desperately in love.  The part that required so much courage.  You see just how much it cost him to fulfill his duties and promises.  And in the end, he died friendless.  No one understood him, until it was too late. 

I just wonder, are there Snapes in our lives?  Are there people around us that bug us, maybe even make life miserable, that have their own tragic story to tell and if we knew it, we would find ourselves feeling compassion toward them?  Would we honor and value them if we only knew?

It's just a story.  Snape was a made up character and his story wasn't real.  But I love him.  I always liked the character and thought he was funny, but when I read the end of the series, and again seeing the story play out on screen, my heart goes out to him.  He never got the girl.  He never even had a friend besides said un-won girl - until Dumbledore and then he has to kill him!  He was hated for being the exact opposite of what he was but could not tell a soul or defend himself in anyway.  He just had to let people hate him and think he was evil.  Sure, he did find enjoyment in tormenting Harry (and others), especially in the early years, but really he was the good guy.  Really, he was one of the best guys in the whole series.

I *heart* Snape.  ... *tear*

Through thick and thin, we are always stronger when we're together.

One year ago yesterday, I received for my birthday two friendship bracelets from a sweet young lady that I know.  She intentionally made one blue, representing Ryan, and one green, representing me.  She had made me friendship bracelets before and I had them tied to my wrist and left them there until they fell off - always within 2-3 weeks.  This time, since there were two, I had them tied together with one knot.  We were about to leave for the beach for several days and I wasn't sure they'd last.  If they somehow did manage to stay on, and hang on for another couple of weeks, they would surely fall off during our second week-long beach trip scheduled for the next month.

Shocked, I continued to wear these two bracelets for days... weeks... months!  I blogged about it in October last year for our anniversary, including my theory and a little photo montage of Ryan and I thru the years.  Yesterday, one year after being tied on, they were still there, faithfully tied together and secure on my wrist.  I decided to cut them off.  I have loved looking at these two bracelets for the past year.  I love what they represent to me.  And I want to hold onto that forever.  So I've saved them as a reminder of just how strong we are and how much we can go through when we stick together, supporting one another, holding onto each other, and just being each other's best friend. 

It's so comforting to know that BlogThings thinks so, too. ;)

You Are Soul Mates

You're in this relationship for the long haul, and it's almost certain that your sweetie is too. Everyone agrees that the two of you are perfect for one another. You were meant to be together. While you and your partner are a good match, you still work hard for what you've got. You are big on respect, communication, and unconditional love. You want this relationship to last forever.

Are You With Your Soul Mate?

Blogthings: We're Not Shrinks, But We Play Them On the Internet

But it is true. :)  I love my Blue. <3

Saying Good-bye to Lila

This weekend was a very special one for us.  Usually, we look forward to General Conerence, watch each session, take lots of notes, go out for our traditional ice creams after Saturday's afternoon session, etc.  This weekend was different.  This weekend, we said good-bye to Grandma Lila.  We did watch the Saturday morning session of Conference, but the rest are waiting for us on the dvr. 

After the morning session on Saturday, we headed over to my aunt and uncle's chapel to participate in a Celebration of Life.  I had been asked to accompany my aunt and two of my cousins as they sang The Lord is My Shepherd.  We got there early to practice a few times.  After we finished practicing, there was still a bit of time before people were to arrive, so Cadi started playing the piano and Rori got on the mic and began singing.  Eventually, they started to coordinate and next thing we knew, Cadi was accompanying Rori as she sang I am a Child of God.  It was so sweet and everyone who was there helping to get ready LOVED it!  Matthew loved it, too, and that was what clinched it for me (since this was for his mom's service).  Rori really wanted to sing in the program, so when it was time for the congregation to share their thoughts and memories of Lila, Rori and I went up so she could sing her song.  (Cadi didn't want to do it in front of everyone, so I filled in.)  I set her up with the mic and sat down next to her at the piano and she sang in front of everyone, all by herself!  And she did a really, really good job!  I don't know how many other people loved it, but I know my family did, and that's what mattered the most to me. :) 

We love the Hills... and they are a little crazy.  It's hard to ever get a picture without someone acting goofy!

It was so wonderful to be a part of this very special time, to remember and celebrate such a sweet and wonderful lady. 

The Celebration of life was fun!  There were lots of memories shared and several musical talents shared, most of whom were Lila's grandchildren; she had always been so proud of how musical and talented her grandchildren were.

After the Celebration of Life, the girls and I went back to the Hills while Ryan wen to Priesthood Session.  We ended up hanging out the rest of the night.  We goofed off, ate some of the leftover food from the service, and just spent time together.  My cousin Chelsie trimmed up the girls' hair since they both needed it badly and they both look so much better now! :)  Thanks, Chels!

There was a lot of leftover Martinelli's, so we toasted to Lila a few more times.  In honor of the "toasting", Chad made toast. lol

On Sunday morning, the girls and I headed into the Gorge to help say good-bye to Lila.  Ryan was going to join us but ended up getting caught up all day with work.  He was so disappointed!  The girls and I had a really nice time with the family though and I'm so glad that we still went, even without Ryan.

We began in the Gorge at HorseTail Falls, one of Lila's favorite places. 

(My camera lens was pretty wet by the time we took the group picture! lol  But it still turned out okay.)

Next we needed to head back in the opposite direction, all the way to the coast.  But first, we stopped at Multnomah Falls to take a restroom break before the long drive.

We caravaned along on our way to Cannon Beach, when all of a sudden the lead car pulled over at this little restaurant.  MaryJane remembered that Lila always stopped to get a milkshake there on her way to the beach, and she really wanted everyone to do that, too.  So, we piled into a side serving room and had milkshakes.  Rori and I shared a blackberry shake that was berry delicious. ;)

Finally, we arrived in Cannon Beach and met up with more family.  We walked along the beach to Haystack Rock and Matthew took her ashes into the waves.  His sister, Jill, brought white roses and threw them into the waves as well.  Of course, the waves just pushed them back on shore at first, so we sprinkled more ashes on the roses and waited for the waves to come get them.  After a few minutes, Jill decided that Lila wouldn't have waited, so neither should we.  She picked up the roses, walked into the water, and placed them into the ocean.  We watched as they were finally carried off, to her final resting place.

The whole weekend was a special experience.  Lila was a wonderful lady and we were fortunate to have been able to become part of her "adopted" family in her final years. 

Good-bye Grandma Lila!  God be with you til we meet again. :)

My Valentine

I love this man.



So, so much!!!  I am so lucky to have him for all of eternity!

Watching from the sidelines.

Sometimes time and distance changes things.

I love my family and I miss interacting with them on a daily basis like I was able to before Ryan and I moved 14 years ago. At first, it was really hard for me, I was so homesick! For years, I wanted to move back so we could be near them again. But time has lessened that feeling. I still love and miss them, but I don't feel homesick anymore. I'm happy where I am and I don't need to move back in order to feel like I'm home. I feel like this is my home and it's where I want to be.

My relationships with my family members have changed because of this. And that makes me sad. I don't feel as close to them, or they to me. I really wish they knew my girls better and had better relationships with them. When I go home to visit, I feel like an outsider. Not that anyone treats me like that - just that I don't know the history behind things, or inside jokes, or what is "the usual".

And then there are the times when something happens and I hear the recounting of the story, but of course, I am not there, so I don't really understand all of it. And I realize that. In some ways, it's easier during those times. I am 600 miles away from the drama, stress, emotions, etc. so when I step away from the e-mail or hang up the phone, I can go on with my daily life and try not to think about what is going on. But that just makes me more of an outsider, and who wants to feel that way about family?

I don't know the answers. I watch from the sidelines because I'm not involved and I wasn't there, so I can't really say anything. My thoughts or feelings hardly count because I wasn't there, I don't know. So, I wait to see how things turn out. It's kind of a miserable feeling. I want to say, "Can't we all just get along?" But I know full well that if I was there, it wouldn't be that simple.

It's hard to know that people are having a hard time and there isn't anything you can do about it. It's hard to sit from the sidelines and just watch things happen to your family that you have no control or say over. I know that I don't know exactly what happened or what it's like, so I know I can't fully judge either way and I can't really say what I think because what I think is only a 600 mile away point of view based on only what I've heard. Because I wasn't there and don't know the full story, I try not to judge or draw conclusions of my own. I try to give the benefit of the doubt. But I know that the ones there can't do that and they do have to make choices on how to handle it and I certainly can't tell them what choice to make because, of course, I wasn't there - I don't know. I also realize that my feelings and opinions are going to be a little different simply because of the distance/seperation between me and everyone else - and that they might not be what's right for those who are actually there and IN it.

Some of my husband's extended family don't speak to each other. There are siblings that haven't spoken in years. And when he is in the area, he has to see them seperately because they refuse to be anywhere that the others are. Sometimes they even get mad if a family member goes to visit and sees the others, even if they also go to see them, too. It's not just inconvenient for those of us who are there to visit family, it's also just plain sad. I never thought something like that would ever happen to my family - and I don't know that it will - I really hope it won't, but I can kind of see now how it could start.

I want the best for each of my siblings and for my family as a whole. I am the oldest and when I did still live at home, most of my siblings were still kids. I naturally had more of an influence (for better or worse, lol) back then. Now, they are all adults and even if I was there, they are capable of, and responsible for, making their own decisions. I don't want to make anyone's decisions for them but it does leave me feeling kind of helpless. I hope that whatever changes need to be made, are made. And whatever needs to be forgiven, is forgiven. Ultimately, I hope and pray that there is growth for everyone and that as everyone moves forward, it is done in a way that makes our family stronger. From here, I feel like hoping and praying is all I can do. :S

Better Together

Yesterday, Ryan and I celebrated our 14th wedding anniversary.  I love him! 

On my birthday, back in July, my friend and neighbor, Kaitlyn, made me two friendship bracelets.  She does this occasionally and I'm always happy to wear them.  This time, she made me two: one in greens, the other in blues.  You see, she knows me well!  The green represented me, the blue represented Ryan.  Typically, these bracelets stay on for about 2-3 weeks before they fall off.  But this time, I asked for them to be tied onto my wrist together, in one knot.  It has been almost 3 months, and they are still there!



I have a theory, of course. 

I think that when these two bracelets were tied on together, the knot became stronger, enabling them to hold on 10 times (so far) longer than one bracelet normally holds on by itself.  And I think it's mighty appropriate!  I know that I am far stronger and much better when I'm by Ryan's side.  He makes me a better person, and if I do say so myself, I think I make him a better person, too.

Simply put: We are Better Together.

Mi Madre

Today is my mom's birthday! Happy Birthday Mom! :)

Obviously, my mom has had a great influence in my life. I often reflect on the counsel/advice she gave me and the example she set while I was growing up. She probably doesn't even realize that I was listening or paying attention at all. lol

Things I learned from my mom:

•How to be a good friend. That it's more important to just listen than to probe and ask questions. That it's important to be trustworthy and honest with them.

•Not to be so dramatic. It may have taken me awhile to apply it, but I remember my mom counseling me a few times that things don't have to be so "black and white", that I didn't need to get so worked up about things, that I could look at other points of view and find compromises and silver linings.

•To love the scriptures. I remember my mom waking us up early in the morning to read scriptures together as a family. I also remember watching my mom have personal scripture study. She may not think she was consistent enough, but I saw her consistently strive to be committed to studying regularly, and that's what I remember.

•To create opportunities for my kids to learn and grow. My mom is hard on herself about this but doesn't realize just how much she really did for us. My parents made sure we got in to the best elementary school around and volunteered there often to be involved in our education. My mom took us to swimming lessons everyday of summer and to the library almost as often. She wasn't able to provide music/dance lessons for all of us, but she did act on every opportunity she could find for us. I was fortunate and did get piano lessons and that was a huge blessing for me.

•To appreciate nature. My mom LOVES all things nature. Animals, trees, mountains, rivers, oceans, flowers... you name it, she loves it. We went on nature hikes, to wildlife preserves, to animal parks, etc. Some of it was boring at the time, but I knew my mom loved it. Now I love those things, too.

•To budget, save, and spend carefully. My family never had much money so my mom had to be very careful on how she spent her money. I hated that we had to shop at thrift stores and I remember being embarrassed of how my mom would pull out her envelopes to pay for things... and now I do the exact same things!

•To work hard for something that is important to you. For years, my mom took us kids around the neighborhood collecting newspapers and cans every week to turn in to the recycling center for cash. We would save the money and use it for the one splurge our family loved most - our annual passes to Marine World Africa USA. No one liked collecting papers, but we all loved going to Marine World. All the work to earn the money was worth it.

•To think of others' needs. Even though we didn't have much, my mom always wanted us to try to give to others. I remember we would read through the newspaper during the holiday season where they would publish a list of people's wishes. Most of the cases were people who had gone through very trying experiences. We would each select which wish we wanted to help come true and we would work to collect/earn money to donate for that wish.

•To serve the Lord. My mom had a testimony and I knew it. She always wanted to do her best to serve the Lord, wherever He needed her. She served in auxillary presidencies, in scouting, as a teacher, etc. Even when the calling was something she didn't feel comfortable with at all, she still accepted it and did her best to fulfill it.

The list could go on and on... I'm grateful to have my mom as my mother. I am grateful for all of the life lessons she has taught (and continues to teach) me. We love you, Mom! Have a Happy Birthday!!!

Father's Day

I am SOOOOOO far behind here!!!  But let me at least post some pics from our Father's Day with the Hills.  We went over after church and had dinner, cake, and played games.  We love them!!  ... Even if they are a little crazy. ;)



I guess... some of us just kinda fit right in. lol

It's late.

Actually, it's early but I haven't gone to bed yet, so I'm up way too late.
And I just typed up a post and then the screen changed without warning and lost it all. Twice. not cool.

I'm in Sacramento. The girls and I came down to attend my sister's baby shower. I miss Ryan.

It's hot here.

The kids are having fun playing together. Rori and Jared are super cute - they hold hands and give each other random hugs.

Cadi gets to have an overnighter with my sister tomorrow night. She likes that special one-on-one time.

I never like to be away from Ryan. He's my best friend. I get enough of a break when I go out for GNOs or weekend getaways - and those are breaks I need as a mom, not as a wife. I love being with Ryan and hope I never want a break from him.

I miss my bed. Rori misses her's too. She cried tonight because she wanted to sleep in her room... but she fell asleep pretty fast, so she must not have minded too much.

It's fun to see family and friends. I was able to visit with a couple of friends I haven't seen in awhile, for one of them, it had been years. I wish I could see them more.

The theme for my sister's shower is 'strawberries'. It is really hard to find strawberry wrapping paper or gift bags.

We're going to the farmer's market tomorrow. I've never been.

I'm hungry. That could be because dinner was 7 hours ago.

I'm tired, but never sleep well without Ryan.

Did I mention that I miss him? I do.

Families can be together forever.

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, we believe that families are essential to God's plan for us.  We are all apart of a family in some way, even if it's not a "traditional" family.  And even if all of our family is gone, we are still all part of God's family.  Family is one of the only things that continues on after this life. 

In the Bible, God commanded his people to build temples, which they did.  And so it's not a surprise that God continues to command his people to build them.  There are currently more than 130 temples in operation today, with several others in the process of being built.  Temples are essential in God's plan for us because that is the only place where families can be sealed for eternity.  Without this sealing by a priesthood holder who has been called and set apart to seal families for eternity, the family unit would end with death. 
It is not hard to understand why this life is just not enough time when you consider your family, your loved ones.  I know that I would not be satisified with just this life with my husband and children.  And what about those who pass away early in life?  It would be impossible to overcome the grief of losing a child in it's youth if there were no promise that you would be reunited with them after this life.

A loving Father in Heaven sent us to experience earth life in a family.  We were born into a family, we learn and grow in our family, and after this life, we are meant to return to Him as a family.

And so it was with a great deal of joy that we were able to attend this special time in our friends' lives as their family was sealed in the temple.  Our friends are like many others who had been married legally and lawfully but not yet eternally.  They have three beautiful children.  They want to be a family forever.  And so on Friday night, they were in the temple, dressed in white, making sacred covenants to love and care for each other for eternity. 

I am grateful for my temple sealing, that our family can be together forever.  I can be a greedy and selfish person sometimes and I want as much time as I can get with them!  Even supposing we all live long, healthy, and happy lives, it will not be long enough for me!  And so, eternity is the only length of time that I think I could be satisfied with. ;)  I am grateful to have been invited to spend such a special occasion with our friends.  Witnessing their special day reminded me of our special day and renewed the joy I felt to be sealed for eternity to my sweetheart.

Because nothing says "I love you" like a Mexican Fiesta!

Every year, our church has a HUGE dance for Valentine's Day.  Each year they choose a theme and go ALL OUT for it.  Most years, it's elegant and often people dress up for it.  It's one of those events where you can go wearing whatever you want - anything from casual to formal.  We love going, it's always amazingly decorated, the food is fabulous, and there is a TON of people, so you always have lots of friends to visit with.  Oh yeah, and there's music for dancing... if you like that kind of thing. ;)

The Sweetheart Ball was last Friday (and yes, I'm late posting about it).  This year it was a Mexican Fiesta and this time people were encouraged to come dressed casual.  I guess formal gowns and fiestas don't exactly mix. lol  But that made getting ready really easy and no painful shoes this year, woohoo! lol  We went with our friends and then we invited all of the friends we ran into there, to join us after for desserts.  We had a fun not-so-little group at the end, eating pie and Shari's.  But I forgot to take a pic! :(  However, here are some pics of the dance:

Nobody's Perfect

As I sit here looking at one of my favorite wedding pictures and thinking about just how much I love this man, I am reminded that as much as I love him, it has not always been easy.  We've been married for over 13 years.  That's a long time.  Not nearly as long as I want to be with him - I never want to be without him!  But still, it's a long time! 

I've said it so many times before and I will say it many more times to come, I am not perfect.  And he is not perfect.  But we are so perfect for each other.  That doesn't mean we always see eye to eye, it doesn't mean we don't fight, it doesn't mean that our feelings don't ever get hurt.  It means that through the good times and the bad, we make each other stronger.  Even when I'm upset with him, because I love him, I want to overcome my feelings (and usually pride) to make things right again.  I think everytime we do that, we become better people and I know our relationship is made stronger.

Ryan is my very, very best friend.  No one knows me like he does.  He can read every look, interpret every action, predict every response... maybe not perfectly, but pretty darn close.  He knows what makes me vulnerable and tries to protect me from those things.  He loves me no matter what and makes sure I know it.  Sometimes I think his love is blind. ;)  Maybe it's more that he sees what no one else sees, a glimpse of what my Heavenly Father sees, so maybe he's actually seeing things more clearly than anyone else, including myself.  We all deserve someone who will see us like that.

Like I said, it hasn't always been easy.  We've dealt with some very difficult things, not all of which have been publicly shared, but what marriage hasn't?  Sometimes I think people look at a person/couple/family and see what is visible on the outside and assume that everything is perfect there, then they feel bad because their situation is different, they are unhappy or struggling with something.  Life is real.  And it's real hard.  And anyone who claims to have the perfect life, isn't being honest with themselves or anyone else.  We all have trials.  The key is to trust that we can learn and grow from every experience we have.  When you see someone so obviously happy, realize that they have had heartache and trials, too.  They may even be experiencing them right now, but they still find joy in the journey and you can too. 

Nobody's perfect.  No marriage is perfect.  I'm just so grateful that I have such a great imperfect person to share my imperfect life with.  Because that makes me perfectly happy. :)