Today we made the difficult decision to let Angel go. After talking to our vet, we realized that not only was Angel not going to get better but everyday was just one more day of suffering for her. So when Acadia got home from school, we took Angel to the animal hospital and she quietly went to sleep.
Acadia has been strong and brave but she is very, very sad. She didn't want to watch Angel die, so we waited in the waiting area. She did want to bury Angel though, so we have brought her body home. We will probably bury her tonight when Ryan gets home. Until then, she is in Acadia's room. When we got home, Cadi shut herself in there for a few minutes to have a good cry.
It's a hard part of life to experience. I am very sad too, but I am mostly sad for Acadia. You want to protect your child from feeling hurt and sadness. But there are parts of life that you just can't protect them from. And really, this is one of those things that even though it's hard to experience, it's a good lesson to learn. She has learned to love and to let go. And she understands that Angel is free of pain now, living in heaven where she can run and play and scurry around as much as she wants. I am grateful that as hard as this weekend has been, she has faith in God and His plan for all of us. I know that this experience will help her when she has to say even more difficult "good-byes".
Tomorrow I will thoroughly clean Angel's cage and all of the little toys and things we had in it for her. Then I will bag it all up to use another time... someday. But not yet.
Showing posts with label Angel. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Angel. Show all posts
Monday, May 21, 2007
Friday, May 18, 2007
Saying good-bye to an Angel.
I remember when we decided to get Cadi a hamster for Christmas, I knew she was going to be so excited! When I got all of the supplies for her, I also bought a book about how to care for hamsters. One of the things I read and almost laughed at was how quickly you become attached to these little creatures. I remember thinking, "It's gonna be Cadi's hamster, not mine."
HA!
Since the day I chose her, bought her, and brought her home, Angel has been half my hamster. As much as I tried to fight it, I couldn't. Even though the plan was for Cadi to clean the cage, I ended up doing it - every single time. And since hamsters are nocturnal, Angel was usually up after Cadi went to bed so Ryan and I would get her out and visit with her. We played with her as much, if not more, than Cadi did!
Well, today I noticed Angel laying with her face in her "potty corner". She was breathing, but it was sporadic. She wouldn't move for a very long time, even when I tried to touch her. She appeared to be having pain, occasionally convulsing. Acadia had already gone to school and I wondered what would be the right thing to do. Angel remained that way for hours.
Finally, after Aurora's morning nap and then eating lunch, I tried to get her to move again. She did! But she was not okay. She couldn't walk well, she mostly dragged herself, slowly. And she kept toppling over. She seemed to be trying to get to the food, so I dumped it out to make it easier for her to get something. I put the water bottle right to her mouth but she didn't seem to want any. Then she just kept walking/dragging herself in circles. Sometimes as she was walking, she would fall over and then end up on her back, eventually she would wiggle herself back over but it took a lot of effort.
I decided to get Cadi out of school about an hour early. Of course, Cadi just cried when I told her why I was getting her! But she was glad I got her, she kept telling me that she was glad to be there because it was important for her to be with Angel. One of the first things she asked me after we got in the car was, "Did you already pray for her?" Of course I had and I didn't say it, but I had also prayed for Cadi. A few minutes later, she said to me, "I know if she dies that it means we did what we were supposed to do to take care of her and now her time here is over."
Fortunately, Angel didn't die before I got Cadi home. In fact, she is still alive. I don't really expect that to last long though. Acadia is hoping for a miracle. But I'm afraid that Angel will be living up to her name here pretty soon. (Too bad we didn't name her "Miracle".)
We love you, Angel!
***Update***
Maybe we SHOULD name her Miracle!
Get this! Angel is still alive! AND she looks a lot better! I can't believe it - I mean she was so, SO gone! She was twitching and falling over and turning onto her back and twitching some more. She would squeal out in pain and breathe sharply! She couldn't hardly move!
And now she is walking (slowly, but walking) - not falling over at all! She has started eating and drinking too!
I am totally shocked!!!
But I'm glad too... as long as she is really okay. She let me pet her and she doesn't seem to be in pain anymore. Right now she's resting, back in her house, so we'll see how she is later tonight and tomorrow.
Man, I guess cats aren't the only ones with 9 lives! :)
HA!
Since the day I chose her, bought her, and brought her home, Angel has been half my hamster. As much as I tried to fight it, I couldn't. Even though the plan was for Cadi to clean the cage, I ended up doing it - every single time. And since hamsters are nocturnal, Angel was usually up after Cadi went to bed so Ryan and I would get her out and visit with her. We played with her as much, if not more, than Cadi did!
Well, today I noticed Angel laying with her face in her "potty corner". She was breathing, but it was sporadic. She wouldn't move for a very long time, even when I tried to touch her. She appeared to be having pain, occasionally convulsing. Acadia had already gone to school and I wondered what would be the right thing to do. Angel remained that way for hours.
Finally, after Aurora's morning nap and then eating lunch, I tried to get her to move again. She did! But she was not okay. She couldn't walk well, she mostly dragged herself, slowly. And she kept toppling over. She seemed to be trying to get to the food, so I dumped it out to make it easier for her to get something. I put the water bottle right to her mouth but she didn't seem to want any. Then she just kept walking/dragging herself in circles. Sometimes as she was walking, she would fall over and then end up on her back, eventually she would wiggle herself back over but it took a lot of effort.
I decided to get Cadi out of school about an hour early. Of course, Cadi just cried when I told her why I was getting her! But she was glad I got her, she kept telling me that she was glad to be there because it was important for her to be with Angel. One of the first things she asked me after we got in the car was, "Did you already pray for her?" Of course I had and I didn't say it, but I had also prayed for Cadi. A few minutes later, she said to me, "I know if she dies that it means we did what we were supposed to do to take care of her and now her time here is over."
Fortunately, Angel didn't die before I got Cadi home. In fact, she is still alive. I don't really expect that to last long though. Acadia is hoping for a miracle. But I'm afraid that Angel will be living up to her name here pretty soon. (Too bad we didn't name her "Miracle".)
We love you, Angel!
***Update***
Maybe we SHOULD name her Miracle!
Get this! Angel is still alive! AND she looks a lot better! I can't believe it - I mean she was so, SO gone! She was twitching and falling over and turning onto her back and twitching some more. She would squeal out in pain and breathe sharply! She couldn't hardly move!
And now she is walking (slowly, but walking) - not falling over at all! She has started eating and drinking too!
I am totally shocked!!!
But I'm glad too... as long as she is really okay. She let me pet her and she doesn't seem to be in pain anymore. Right now she's resting, back in her house, so we'll see how she is later tonight and tomorrow.
Man, I guess cats aren't the only ones with 9 lives! :)
Friday, March 10, 2006
Random Photo
Well, it isn't completely random...
This is from Monday night. We had one of Ryan's co-workers and his family over for dinner. Their son is 9 and he and Cadi had lots of fun playing with Angel. At one point, they came across a couple of scrunchies and thought, "What if we put these on Angel?" Well, they did and Angel became Angelina...
This is from Monday night. We had one of Ryan's co-workers and his family over for dinner. Their son is 9 and he and Cadi had lots of fun playing with Angel. At one point, they came across a couple of scrunchies and thought, "What if we put these on Angel?" Well, they did and Angel became Angelina...
Saturday, February 25, 2006
Meet Angel
I just realized this morning, that I never posted a picture of Angel. So, here are a few...
And here is Angel in action, "Run like the wind, Angel!"
This is my favorite pic so far. She was on this blanket, on my lap, and she fell asleep... Awwww!
And now for a couple of Cadi-isms...
Cadi: We need to make a list tonight.
Me: Okay, what do we need to make a list of?
Cadi: I don't know... just a list.
Cadi: His shoes are just like mine!
Me: Oh really?
Cadi: Yeah, except they don't light up, they are different colors, and they are definitely NOT the same style.
LOL
And here is Angel in action, "Run like the wind, Angel!"
This is my favorite pic so far. She was on this blanket, on my lap, and she fell asleep... Awwww!
And now for a couple of Cadi-isms...
Cadi: We need to make a list tonight.
Me: Okay, what do we need to make a list of?
Cadi: I don't know... just a list.
Cadi: His shoes are just like mine!
Me: Oh really?
Cadi: Yeah, except they don't light up, they are different colors, and they are definitely NOT the same style.
LOL
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
Christmas Gifts
What a Christmas! The most exciting parts were Acadia's gifts.
The first thing she got wasn't wrapped. It was a large cage with a super cute hamster inside. It is a Honey Bear Hamster and Cadi has named her Angel. She is a sweet little girl who has been very nice with Cadi and not frightened by the curious dog.
Her second gift was a t-shirt. Not too exciting? Well, this particular shirt had a message. It says, "I'm Gonna Be the Big Sister"! Once she put two and two together, Acadia went crazy! She started dancing and singing, "I'm not going to be the only child anymore! All my dreams are coming true!" lol It was fun to watch and yes, we did get it on video.
Later during the day we let Cadi tell her grandparents what she got for Christmas, including the shirt and what it meant. Of course, everyone is excited. We are all happy. Catch Cadi's brief thoughts on her blog.
I have been VERY sick. And I've been having some concerns as well. I have had some cramping from the very beginning which does cause us to worry. Given our history we have been very cautious again. We have the general rule of not making announcements until after we've heard a heartbeat. This time we were very concerned with all the cramping so my doctor had me go in early for an ultrasound at 7 weeks. We had a nice strong heartbeat and the baby looked real good. They also found a large cyst, the size of a baseball, on one of my ovaries. While cysts can be normal, this one is quite large and is probably contributing to the cramping as well as the strong sickness I feel round the clock. But it is also helping to hold onto this pregnancy so we can't really complain.
Today I went in to see the nurse. It is too early for their monitor to detect a heartbeat so I didn't get to hear it again. I had been hoping to, mostly because I am still cramping and once you've heard it, you just want to keep hearing it! But I have an appointment in two weeks with my doctor and they will be able to hear it then. The doctor also ordered another ultrasound for next month. They want to watch me closely to make sure everything is okay. I've been lucky to have a really good doctor who listens to me and makes me feel like I'm a priority. Whenever I've called with a concern, she responds immediately.
We debated on telling Acadia this soon. We aren't out of the first trimester yet and there is still significant risk. But I have been so sick that I could not hide it and it has been causing Cadi to worry. In fact, a few weeks ago she asked me if I was dying because I had been so sick for so long. I think I was able to convince her that I would be okay, but we really don't want her to worry more than she already has been. She is old enough to understand more than she could have before. So we have explained that sometimes a baby starts to grow and then sometimes it just stops and then the mom doesn't have a baby afterall. She understand that this is a possibilty. But she also knows why I've been so sick and she doesn't have to worry about me anymore. We felt like it would be more important to just tell her and I know we made the right decision.
Today the doctor's office gave me one of those little booklets that shows pictures of how a baby develops. We've already shown Cadi what the baby looks like right now and just how little it is, the size of a peanut. She is amazed at that. lol She admits that she really wants a little sister, but she will be happy with a brother too. Ryan is about 50/50 on it, he absolutely LOVES having a daughter and would love another one too. But then, he knows he will easily love a son just as much. I lean towards another girl. It would be slightly easier, though really no matter what we will be starting over completely! We have NOTHING left from when Cadi was born. About 2 years ago we finally realized that there was a good chance we may never have another child so we donated all our things to help families in need. We are praying that since we tried to be generous then that we will be blessed with all we will need now, lol. Besides, the styles have changed alot in the last 7 years - it will be fun to go shopping for the new toys and gadgets! lol
So, I'm due at the very end of July. I'm really hoping to have it in July and not in August. Partly because I don't want to be pregnant in the middle of Summer longer than I have to. And partly because I love July's birthstone! lol
Sometimes it still seems unreal. We are very happy and are praying for everything to work out this time. But it is going to be a big adjustment! It has been a long time since we've had a baby, lol. And after so many years of not getting our hopes up, it is weird to actually have something work out. But in a very good way. Like Ryan said two weeks ago when we heard the heartbeat, "That's all the Christmas present I need!"
The first thing she got wasn't wrapped. It was a large cage with a super cute hamster inside. It is a Honey Bear Hamster and Cadi has named her Angel. She is a sweet little girl who has been very nice with Cadi and not frightened by the curious dog.
Her second gift was a t-shirt. Not too exciting? Well, this particular shirt had a message. It says, "I'm Gonna Be the Big Sister"! Once she put two and two together, Acadia went crazy! She started dancing and singing, "I'm not going to be the only child anymore! All my dreams are coming true!" lol It was fun to watch and yes, we did get it on video.
Later during the day we let Cadi tell her grandparents what she got for Christmas, including the shirt and what it meant. Of course, everyone is excited. We are all happy. Catch Cadi's brief thoughts on her blog.
I have been VERY sick. And I've been having some concerns as well. I have had some cramping from the very beginning which does cause us to worry. Given our history we have been very cautious again. We have the general rule of not making announcements until after we've heard a heartbeat. This time we were very concerned with all the cramping so my doctor had me go in early for an ultrasound at 7 weeks. We had a nice strong heartbeat and the baby looked real good. They also found a large cyst, the size of a baseball, on one of my ovaries. While cysts can be normal, this one is quite large and is probably contributing to the cramping as well as the strong sickness I feel round the clock. But it is also helping to hold onto this pregnancy so we can't really complain.
Today I went in to see the nurse. It is too early for their monitor to detect a heartbeat so I didn't get to hear it again. I had been hoping to, mostly because I am still cramping and once you've heard it, you just want to keep hearing it! But I have an appointment in two weeks with my doctor and they will be able to hear it then. The doctor also ordered another ultrasound for next month. They want to watch me closely to make sure everything is okay. I've been lucky to have a really good doctor who listens to me and makes me feel like I'm a priority. Whenever I've called with a concern, she responds immediately.
We debated on telling Acadia this soon. We aren't out of the first trimester yet and there is still significant risk. But I have been so sick that I could not hide it and it has been causing Cadi to worry. In fact, a few weeks ago she asked me if I was dying because I had been so sick for so long. I think I was able to convince her that I would be okay, but we really don't want her to worry more than she already has been. She is old enough to understand more than she could have before. So we have explained that sometimes a baby starts to grow and then sometimes it just stops and then the mom doesn't have a baby afterall. She understand that this is a possibilty. But she also knows why I've been so sick and she doesn't have to worry about me anymore. We felt like it would be more important to just tell her and I know we made the right decision.
Today the doctor's office gave me one of those little booklets that shows pictures of how a baby develops. We've already shown Cadi what the baby looks like right now and just how little it is, the size of a peanut. She is amazed at that. lol She admits that she really wants a little sister, but she will be happy with a brother too. Ryan is about 50/50 on it, he absolutely LOVES having a daughter and would love another one too. But then, he knows he will easily love a son just as much. I lean towards another girl. It would be slightly easier, though really no matter what we will be starting over completely! We have NOTHING left from when Cadi was born. About 2 years ago we finally realized that there was a good chance we may never have another child so we donated all our things to help families in need. We are praying that since we tried to be generous then that we will be blessed with all we will need now, lol. Besides, the styles have changed alot in the last 7 years - it will be fun to go shopping for the new toys and gadgets! lol
So, I'm due at the very end of July. I'm really hoping to have it in July and not in August. Partly because I don't want to be pregnant in the middle of Summer longer than I have to. And partly because I love July's birthstone! lol
Sometimes it still seems unreal. We are very happy and are praying for everything to work out this time. But it is going to be a big adjustment! It has been a long time since we've had a baby, lol. And after so many years of not getting our hopes up, it is weird to actually have something work out. But in a very good way. Like Ryan said two weeks ago when we heard the heartbeat, "That's all the Christmas present I need!"
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