Two steps forward, one step back

Things have gotten much easier in many ways... but these mornings...!!! They are still hard. And today I met my match. Let me just say that OJ and I do not get along. Which really is too bad because I love a nice glass of orange juice every now and then. But I think I'll be steering clear for the next few weeks. Not fun.

All Systems: Go

This morning Ryan and I went to my 11 week check up. I haven't been too nervous, but I have been anxious to hear the heartbeat again. At first she had trouble finding it, which made me worry. But then, there it was! Yeah, I cried. It was a relief and now I have no worries. I'm near the end of the first trimester and everything looks great. And now I'm ready to start shopping! lol

During the exam she also felt around and didn't find any signs of the cyst! So we aren't going to do the ultrasound this month like we originally planned. The next one will be around 20 weeks.

I received a Priesthood blessing a week ago. I had just spent two days in bed with a horrible migraine which came at the end of my most difficult week yet. I was so sick and miserable! But during that blessing I felt a change and I immediatly felt better. This past week has been much easier. I am still sick in the mornings but the rest of the day is pretty good and most evenings I do alright too. I still have some cramps, headaches, fatigue, and tenderness - but the sick feeling is the worst part so I'm glad that's down to mornings only. I don't doubt that the blessing is what made the difference. Even my headaches are better - I have had a couple of little headaches, but they never grew to be migraines and that is awesome.

I am so grateful for that blessing! I believe the blessing somehow chased away that cyst. It didn't burst (which would have been extremely painful for a couple of days) but the severe symptoms did seem to just drop dramatically overnight.

I still have had a hard time believing that this is real this time. But hearing the heartbeat now, near the end of the first trimester, it is actually sinking in. This one has stuck and it's actually going to make it!

They say that every baby is a miracle. But I don't think that most people realize just how true that is. When you've gone through the problems of trying to have children, you start to see just what a miracle it is everytime a baby is born. I know that I took for granted how blessed we were to have Acadia with no major problems. But now that we've experienced our own trials, I realize that once this baby is born, I will have had two miracle babies.

I had accepted that Acadia would probably be an only child. I was okay with it, I felt peaceful about it. I knew that the Lord was in control and I trusted Him. But I can't tell you how good it feels to find out I was wrong! That yes, the Lord IS in control but Cadi won't be the only one, He is sending us one more. Who knows if this will be the last or if there are more surprises for us in the future. Right now, I don't care. I feel like we just won the Wild Card and are getting more than we deserve already. lol

Sorry ladies, he's taken!

I think you should all know that I married the most awesome guy ever! So, I regret to inform the rest of the ladies out there that you’ll have to settle for #2. But I’m sure #2 isn’t bad at all either, so that’s okay… right?

Man, my man has been so good to me though. He has really gone above and beyond while I’ve been sick. From the very beginning, he has insisted that I rest and relax. He has not expected, asked, or even hinted at wanting me to do anything “productive”. Part of it is because he wants to make sure this pregnancy is healthy and if that means that he has to do all the things that need to be done so that I don’t have to – it’s what he’ll do. But alot of it is because he is just so wonderful.

He works LONG days and has a pretty demanding calling in church. He has not shirked his duties in the slightest. But every moment he is home, he has attended to Acadia , myself, or the house. He has done every little bit of cooking, cleaning, laundry, and dishes that have happened in the last several weeks. (With a little help with Cadi, who likes to help with dishes, sometimes.) Then on top of that, he has done my errands for me, been my gopher for water, crackers, or whatever, rubbed my feet, made runs for food – and then ate what I couldn’t stomach, read to me, and has offered his sleeve for my tears when I just felt so bad I couldn’t help but just cry.

And he has done every bit of this with a loving attitude and a smile. He actually says that he likes it and is happy to do all of this. And he means it! He is the best husband ever – and I’m the lucky one, cause he’s mine.

I love you, Roe

Resolutions

Okay, I didn't make any this year. But I'm okay with that, lol.


However, I think that Ryan and Acadia have made at least one together: eat as much sweets as you can. I had a meeting with the youth after church today and when I got home, there was an apple pie in the oven and they were were talking about making cookies and cupcakes too! I convinced them to only make one or the other. So we ended up with an apple pie and chocolate cupcakes. Why? No idea.

Our home teachers came over (Wow, on the FIRST! lol Actually they were over mostly to give me a blessing. This is the week I've been dreading. It's the week when I normally start seeing definite signs of a miscarriage. I'm not really worried, but I will be glad when the week passes without a problem.). We sent one home with half a pie and the other one with a plate of cupcakes (his wife was actually making a pie today too! lol).

Crazy, crazy. So, my family is a bit backwards I guess. Instead of making resolutions and breaking them after a week or two, they just make ones they know they can keep right off the bat! And in the meantime, they sabotage everyone else's resolutions too! lol

The last "five" of 2005

1. What did you learn in 2005?


I've learned lots of things. I've learned a little more patience. I've learned to put total trust in the Lord. I've learned how to ice skate. I've learned that I can do anything I put my mind to.


2. Knowing what you know now, what would you have done differently throughout the year?

Hmmm. I don't know that I would have done anything differently.


3. What were your biggest challenges of the year and how did you overcome them?

By far the biggest challenge for me was having a miscarriage in the Spring. And the second most difficult thing was the week of the due date. They were overcome by faith and the love and support of the people around me.


4. What were your biggest accomplishments of the year?

I think my biggest accomplisment was running in the 10K on Thanksgiving - especially now that I know I was pregnant at the time! It wasn't really an accomplishment, but another big "moment" was going killer whale watching this summer.


5. What are your hopes for 2006?

A healthy pregnancy ending in a healthy baby. And then me losing all the baby weight, lol.

Ultrasound Pic and Cadi Cuteness

First of all...


So, there you go.  It was amazing to see that little thing and still be able to see a definite heart beat, it was huge when you think of the size of the baby.  Next ultrasound will be sometime in the second half of January.

Now for some Cadi Cuteness:

Acadia has decided to ask her friends who are big sisters to "train" her how to be a big sister.  In the mean time she asked me to teach her some things.  I joked with her about changing diapers.  She said, "Well, you need to teach me about taking care of boys and girls."  I told her that most of taking care of a baby is the same for boys and girls, especially at first.  To which she responded, "Yeah, but boys have... a pipe!"

It doesn't look half as cute or funny typed out on here as it was in person! 

I'm not complaining... Okay, maybe I am.

I am very happy to be pregnant and that it is going well this time. And if that means I have to be miserable, that's okay. But man is it getting old!

It isn't just being sick at all hours of the day and night, being tired, feeling dizzy most of the time, having cramps everyday, getting migraines about once a week, and having my boobs hurt so bad I wish I could just chop them off. Cause you know, that would be bad enough. No, what really makes it awful is the excessive amounts of saliva I have COMBINED with the horrible aftertaste I have in my mouth after every single thing I eat or drink. (Including brushing my teeth, using mints or gum.) It may not sound that bad to you, but trust me, it's awful! Especially since that makes me even more nauseaus. And it's been going on for a month now!

The exhaustion, cramps and migraines are not constant. Thankfully. And my doctor gave me an idea to help with the nauseausness, I'm hoping it will work. And I'm hoping that somehow if I don't feel so sick, the other things won't be so bad.
But there you have it, I've used my complimentary "Get to complain for Free" card. Now I'll go back to being glad that the pregnancy is healthy this time. Because if all this misery is what it takes to get the job done, then it will be worth it.