Yesterday I received a new calling at church. In the
LDS church, there is no paid ministry, so the members each accept different responsibilities to share the work and learn and grow through different opportunities. These responsibilities/jobs are called "callings" and they can last for any length of time. You don't campaign or even ask for a calling, it is something that the Bishop and other leaders pray about and carefully ponder who the Lord would like to serve in that capacity at that time. Once they receive the name, they extend the call and ask if you'd be willing to do it. You can say yes or no, it is completly optional. When you are "released" from a calling, it isn't an indication of poor execution or anything negative, it is simply time to do something else. As we serve in our callings, we are often asked to do things we haven't done before, so it's a great opportunity to learn and grow in different ways. It helps us meet new people and develop relationships we might not have developed otherwise. We are blessed spiritually and often in other ways as well. It is a great blessing to be able to contribute and be a part of the Lord's work.
But back to my new calling. I've known this one was coming. No one told me, just whisperings of the spirit, but I knew that this would be my next calling even before I was released as Relief Society president. And I knew when, too. Not the day exactly, but I knew who I was replacing and for what reason.
Lyndel Wilkinson (one of my first Mia Maids when I served as the Mia Maid counselor in YW many years ago) had put her papers in to serve a mission. She hadn't received her call yet, but I knew that when she did, I would fill her spot as Gospel Doctrine teacher.
Gospel Doctrine is a Sunday School class and it is pure scripture study. We really dive in, study it out, discuss what it means and how it applies to us. We seek to understand the doctrine of Christ's church so we can better live it. And we do this weekly in a Sunday School setting. This year, we are studying the New Testament and my first lesson will be in two weeks. My topic is AWESOME! It will be "He Is Not Here, For He is Risen" - can you think of a more positive, hope filled topic? I can't.
Teaching Gospel Doctrine is very intimidating. We have a great group of scriptorians in our ward and now I'll have to teach and lead the discussions as we study the scriptures! But I am actually excited and looking forward to it! I am amazed at how true that statement is.
Four years ago, I knew I was being prepared for a big change in my calling. I had been serving in the Young Women presidency for a few years and I loved it. But I knew my time was almost over, even though I didn't want it to be. After some time, I came to grips with that thought, but I still felt the preparations. Why was it taking so long? What on earth did I need to have SO MUCH preparation for? I began to think of the scariest calling I could get.
Gospel Doctrine teacher.
That had to be it! There was nothing else I could fathom even being considered for that would be so scary and require so much preparation. So, when I sat in Bishop Green's office, I was prepared to accept that call. But he said something else - Relief Society president. I thought it was a joke. I laughed! But he didn't, and he wasn't joking. I instantly was wishing it was Gospel Doctrine teacher! lol I was sure that was what I had been being prepared for.
Well, it turns out, in a round about way, I was!
My time serving as Relief Society president was challenging, rewarding, wonderful, and sometimes terrifying, but over all, a huge and remarkable blessing in my life. I learned and grew so much and I don't want to stop learning and growing. I knew I would be given a rest after being released from RS, and I really needed it. I was exhausted! I spent my first week just sleeping - like a lot! I was sleeping as much as I do when I'm pregnant! lol I didn't realize how exhausting it had been until the mantle had been taken from me and I had time to sit without responsibilities and ponder on my experiences.
I have been grateful for this rest. But in the last few weeks, especially since I knew what was waiting for me, and especially knowing exactly when Lyndel would be leaving for the MTC, I have felt very anxious. I had been given a smaller calling just a few weeks after my RS release, but it isn't heavy, busy, or challenging and most of all, I knew it wasn't all that the Lord wanted me to do. So I've just been waiting, hoping, anxious, and excited to get going on this. I've pondered what it means, what it will require, what I hope to gain, and what I hope I can bring to our Sunday School discussions.
I am still intimidated when I think about some of it. But more than that, I feel a love for the scriptures, a strong testimony that burns within my heart, a desire to serve, a desire to learn and grow, a desire to be faithful and obedient. And even though I don't know as much as many who will be sitting in the classroom, I have a testimony of personal revelation to help me be prepared enough to begin and lead the discussions that will allow them to share their knowledge, experiences, and testimonies that will help to enlighten and enrich the rest of us.
The Lord knows us better than we know ourselves. He knows when and how we need certain things done. I didn't need to know that this would be my calling so far in advance. But the Lord knew it would be easier for me this way. I could have had it totally sprung on me last week and I'd be shocked, scared, and would stumble my way through the next couple of weeks trying to get the courage and confidence to teach my first lesson - but I would have done it. And eventually, I would have gotten used to it and all would be fine. But it was so much nicer to know 4 months ago, to get the nervous part out of the way while it was so far off that it wasn't really real yet. It was nice to reach a point where I was just waiting and hoping for the call, wanting it, instead of dreading it.
So if you're in my ward, please be patient with me; I am not the best teacher or anywhere near the scriptorian I hope to someday be, but I will always do my best to be prepared. And please read the lesson ahead of time so you can help me out by being better prepared to participate in the discussions. I am looking forward to them, and I hope you are too. :)
